Dates for me while the whole table has roast chicken

This was my first Ramadan as a Muslim, and tonight I sat at a table full of family who are not fasting. The living room smelled of garlic and roast chicken, my cousin replayed the same joke, someone left their phone face-up with a video on mute. I poured myself a glass, counted three Medjools like my grandmother used to tell me, and ate them with my head down. People passed plates and laughed, nobody asked why I was nibbling dates while they piled their plates. I felt both like an intruder and like I was carrying something precious in silence. Has anyone else broken their fast like this? How did you get through those small, heavy moments?