I married into a family where my choices vanish

I knew there would be adjustments when I moved into my in-laws' house by the creek in Mombasa, but I did not expect the slow erasure. Small things first: the jilbab I was planning to wear to Eid replaced by a folded one in the wardrobe because my mother-in-law 'likes it better this way', my phone left on read in the family WhatsApp when I politely disagree, being asked to follow their recipe for every meal even though I grew up eating coconut and lemongrass. I want to keep peace, to be grateful, to honour elders, but every time I swallow my preference I feel a little smaller. Do I speak up and risk being called difficult, or keep quiet to preserve the calm I came here for? Has anyone else lived this slow shrinking, and how did you decide which line to draw?