I say alhamdulillah, but my heart aches

I just read The Du'a Between Us on Athar and it landed right where it was tender. We have been trying for a child for five years, and most days I say alhamdulillah like a rhythm, while a quiet ache settles in my ribs. I fold laundry on the bus after school drop-off, I make tea in our tiny kitchen at fajr and let the kettle hide the tears. My husband and I sometimes leave each other's messages on read, not from anger but because there are no words that feel true. I am trying to hold onto sabr without pretending I am fine. If you have been here, how did you actually live it, day to day?